I was forced...

so all my friends have gone, save for three, which begs the question; "why am I still here?"

it's become lonely in livejournal land ... but I do like the idea of journaling ... let me rethink this whole thing ...

So I've given up my paid account ... it's funny to me that I ever even had a paid account. The last several months have been wasted money and that's just irresponsible behavior. I suppose I missed the boat and never caught on the LJ wave. It was exciting in the beginning, like joining a club where all the cool kids hang out. Lately, it's become a place I go to read about what others are doing rather than contribute anything myself. It's not as if I don't care or have nothing to say. Leigh would be the first to tell you that I always have something to say. I'm an expressive person. I have opinions ... I guess LJ never became a habit. It was never really mine, "I was forced ..." remember? and as a result, it's rarely my first, second, or third option.

Anyway, for now I return to the unpaid, basic account. To all those that can't stand the passive LJ friend who really isn't; feel free to de-friend or more appropriately, de-clutter your friend list. I take no offense. In fact, I'd probably do the same if I gave a rat's arse.

However, if you can stand my once-in-a-blue-moon presence, then let the good posts keep rolling! Who knows, once lifted, the burden of a paid account might free my mind to give this forum another chance!

... stranger things have happened ;)

Just bought tickets to see Fleetwood Mac in May - Woot! Hope to buy Boss tickets this Monday for a reasonable price ... and would love to score The Killers tickets, but they're kinda expensive so far that I've found.

Let the concert season begin!

My stomach hurts for some reason ... it's been mildly aching for most of the day, and where typically I might think that it was because of a cancerous tumor (I'm quite the hypochondriac) I don't think that today. I think that I don't eat right and my body is telling me to stop feeding it garbage. I think I don't drink enough water or move enough. I think I've fallen apart, or at least off the wagon, and I need to climb back on, or in - whatever.

Getting back into relative shape means a lot. It means that I have to stop being lazy and start taking some responsibility for how I feel and how I look. It means commitment, and that's confusing because I'm usually so good with that concept. It's so easy to become complacent, so easy to fall into temptation, quite simply, so easy not to care; but where did this come from? I have some theories, but by now all those reasons should have long gone. Obviously not? Or maybe it's that I use those reasons as excuses for why I haven't moved on ...

So I've decided to post about my struggle, because writing it down (well posting it up) will help, because others will read it. I'm not asking anything of anyone, but if this 'battle' is out in the open, maybe I won't have anymore excuses to continue along this self-indulgent "poor me" pathway.

Germs suck. Especially ones that linger on planes, hiding in the ventilation system, mutating, only to be recycled upon unsuspecting passengers as they settle in for a long 9 hour cross continental journey.

Currently, I'm sitting under the duvet in Leigh's old room, re-familiarizing myself with this whole bloggng thing ... what's it been? Awhile, let's just leave it at that.

Maldon, Essex. It's bloody cold here, though not snowing, and that's only because it hasn't rained. We arrived in England last Monday (because our flight out of Houston left without us, suspending our international trip and forcing us to take shelter at some Motel across from a Waffle House - oh yeah). 4 days left and I'm wondering why time away on holiday goes so quickly? Why also does Murphy's Law apply, leaving Leigh as sick as a dog for the past 3 days? Poor guy.

Tomorrow I'm on a train back into London to see a couple of old friends (and someone's nieces!) only to return to Maldon on New Year's Eve and ring in the New Year Essex style. Woot. God how I've missed this country.

I was feeling crap this morning, but now I'm feeling pretty good. I'm fighting like h-e-double-hockey-sticks to not catch what the mister has. I'm treading water at the moment, holding my own. Night Nurse tonight for sure, and tomorrow, some Lemsip - ilch, haven't missed that stuff at all.

Did you know, Woolworth's has gone out of business? It's sad really. Where can a girl find any Quality Street now? Giant Buttons? Just devastating.

Am I back in the game? Only the New Year can tel. If I'm not back by then, Happy New Year to all - and to all a good night!

I cannot wait for Wednesday ... enough already! I need for Monday, Tuesday, and the work day Wednesday to whiz by ... never again, I tell you ... NEVER ... 2 weeks is absolutely too long.

I'm dying here.

I made the most amazing Chicken Cacciatore-esque meal tonight! Yummy. Sometimes I amaze myself in the kitchen. To be honest, I quite enjoy cooking.

I have officially begun practicing to take the Social Work licensing exam ... it's scary business. I purchased 5 online practice tests (went in half with a co-worker's friend who is also studying for the exam) and finished the first practice exam just a few minutes ago, with 1hr. 30 minutes to spare - you get 4 hours to take the entire exam - (each exam is 200 multiple choice questions covering everything from legal and ethical considerations to theory and casework, assessment, diversity, intervention and treatment spanning all populations of clients, not just those that I am trained to work with).

I scored 52%, which isn't bad considering I haven't studied. I consider this score my baseline. There's only room for improvement, which over the course of the next couple of months, I plan on doing. If I can score higher the second time around and achieve a consistent score of about 74% for the remainder 3 practice exams, I am confident that I can pass.

I am involved in a study/licensing exam support group through work where two people have just passed their first exam and one person went on to pass the second, making her an official LCSW (Licensed Clinical Social Worker) Odds are in my favor, but that means I have to focus over these next few months ... and that's not going to be easy.

So we're back from Vegas ... it was lovely - HOT - but lovely. We didn't win anything (we never seem to when we're there), still it was nice just being away from The Bay Area for awhile.

It never got below 99 degrees Fahrenheit, at any point in the day ... and yes, I'm including the late night as well. We went to the Hoover Dam and took the Dam Power Plant tour ... we had two dam guides and got some dam souvenirs afterwards ... heh, heh, I can be funny, no?

We swam, drank and walked quite a bit. Stayed at the Tropicana, saw a show at Excalibur (The Tournament of Kings) and ate cornish game hens with our hands. We found a great Irish Pub and had martini's at The Red Square bar at the Mandalay Bay where a statue of Lenin was beheaded ... twice!

We also went to Vegas to visit my dad's friend who recently survived a huge heart attack, kidney failure, and blood infections. He looks good, though is still recuperating. His wife is hilarious. They took us all out to this restaurant "Lucille's" where I had the best tasting pulled pork sandwich ever and a nice big glass of Sweet Tea, served in a Mason Jar, just like they make it in the deep south!

I love traveling, and sadly, I don't get to do much chained to the present job which offers garbage holiday time. Alas, no one ever said this post had to be permanent. Today rounds out the last of this holiday. I'll be doing laundry and taking in as much of the day as possible, before heading back into the office tomorrow - sigh.

( I've included a lot of pictures, so be prepared ... )

I am in pain. A couple of days ago I pulled a muscle in my neck, or strained it, and it's been terrible ever since ... I hate that I can't turn my head completely. I feel so incapacitated.

Tomorrow we are going to be meeting with a real estate agent/mortgage broker ... long story short, this is just an initial meeting. We have no expectations and honestly, we are not really in the position to seriously consider buying a house at this moment in time ... having said that, I suppose anything can happen ...

The last 3 weeks at work have been absolutely mad ...

I cannot wait to go to Vegas next weekend. We are leaving on Wednesday night and returning on Sunday. Relaxation is the only thing on the agenda. I am going to sit by the pool and soak up the sun, the margaritas : ) and love the fact that I'm not at work. So many of my clients are in crisis. Enough already. Enough.

More random cat pictures as lately, I'm obsessed ... Bailey and Simon absolutely adore their new cat condo.







Manuel and I saw Dolly Parton on Tuesday ... great show ... he got to meet her, which was awesome for him, as he's an incredibly HUGAMONGOUS Dolly fan. Check out his Facebook Profile for the famous photos ... here are some pics from the show


Manuel's now infamous Dolly tattoo (it was highly regarded by Ms. Parton herself!)


Not bad for 60+

Work was hell this week - so busy - clients with waaayy too many problems. Sometimes it's really hard to cope when all you deal with all day, every day are people who are broken in every way imagineable.

Manuel and I saw The Dan Band last night at The Fillmore in San Francisco. The Fillmore is a historical music hall which, over the years, has hosted the likes of Janis Joplin, The Grateful Dead, Pink Floyd, The Who, Jimi Hendrix Experience, Jefferson Airplane ... you get the drift.

Anyway, one unique feature about The Fillmore are the band posters which they have made special, for every show. They have all of the posters of just about every act that's performed there over the last several decades. We were perusing this wall of fame when we came upon a band poster for No Doubt, a show we went to exactly 12 years ago to the date (Aug. 2nd)

12 years ago we were standing in that very same auditorium, listening then, to an up and coming punk/ska band from So.Cal. Who knew they'd go on to become as big as they did, or Gwen Stefani, as huge a mogul as she has ...

Simon's earmites are stubborn; hence he required another ear flush/treatment today. He's due for a follow up in 2 weeks when he will also be needing his vaccination boosters. Ugh. He gained 1 lb. in 2 weeks ... and I think we'll be cutting down the food. Apparently we at the Burton residence grow fat kitties.

If we bought tickets today to England they would cost us about $1245 per person. Flying in to Gatwick doesn't necessarily save us money. I see absolutely no problem saving the rest which means we will most likely be spending the Christmas/New Years holiday in the UK. Lovely.

We are headed to Las Vegas at the end of August! I am absolutely thrilled as I feared we wouldn't be going anywhere this summer. We will probably stay at the Tropicana where I can pretend to be in Hawaii, sipping strawberry daiquiri's by the pool ... ahhh.

I'm excited about The Renaissance Faire this fall. I've never actually been, so I have no idea what it's like, but for some reason this year I really want to go. http://www.norcalrenfaire.org/

I saw Mamma Mia the other night at the cinema with a friend ... the stage musical was much better, although I don't think I hated it quite as much as Manuel did

After seeing Mamma Mia I decided that I really needed to put some ABBA on my iPod, so I did.

And now a simile:
Work this week was like a roller coaster; slow and steady on Monday, building intensity on Tuesday, climaxing Wednesday with the busiest weekday ever in recorded history, slowing down Thursday to an almost halt on Friday.

I had minor surgery Friday afternoon. I have/had a mole on the left side of my face, which over the past few months had been playing up. My dermatologist (who is the coolest guy ever - next to my husband) said it was time to get rid of it. *poof* and it was gone. The only downside is that I trade the mole for a scar. Dr. Murad said it will be small, about 1 cm, still it's a scar. I might as well be Frankenstein (big pause for sympathy) Ok, I'm over it.

We've decided not to go to Seattle. The trip just got too expensive ... sucks because we already bought tickets to Jack Johnson, but we may have a buyer for those, which will be nice. So maybe we'll do a mini road trip instead.

Besides, we're really trying to head across the pond this winter over Christmas. I've already asked for the time off and had it pre-approved (which is different from approved - whatever, my job blows sometimes) Anyway, we should be able to swing it ... if we start seriously saving now.

August 2nd I'm going to see The Dan Band with Manuel ... and on the 5th is Dolly Parton (for the third time) with Manuel again. He loves her SO MUCH and is trying to win an opportunity to meet her back stage. He already has his Dolly outfit picked out and next week he is going to add to his Dolly Parton tattoo. He's so excited, but it borders on obsessive. It scares me a little -

Speaking of tattoo's; I want another one. I think this time I want a black and gray one on my shoulder, but I don't know what to get.

Simon the little wonder cat is doing better after all of his injections, ear issues and poop problems. He eats like a horse. He and Bailey are getting along much better as well. She's now grooming him before she bites him ... and yesterday, I caught them hugging (or was she just choking him?)


Love this photo!

I miss my aunt.

Note to Self

Don't think that after sitting around on your arse for about a year, doing fu*k all, that you can hop on your bike and ride around Lake Chabot your first time out ... it's just not happening.

... and I dropped my camera and broke it some more - it still works!




Still, a lovely day!

When does a woman become domesticated? Why does it sound like we're being equated to animals? Apart from the fact that all humans ARE animals … I mean when I hear the word 'domesticated', house cats pop into my head, or ferrets, dogs, etc. etc. Why are women 'domesticated'?

Are men domesticated? I've never heard a man ask another man; "When did you become so domesticated?" Maybe it's because I don't hang out with a lot of guys, or maybe it's because all of the men I do hang out with are married, and hence, domesticated (gulp). There are exceptions ... my brother being one, but I'm pretty sure he's an anomaly ... and my friend Manuel, but he's gay and I don't think it counts among gay men. I mean, they are all a bunch of girls anyway right? (Sarcasm ladies and gentlemen, please, lighten up)

Collective sigh

I've been told - recently and in the past - that I've "become domesticated" and I don’t know how I feel about that.

Yesterday I baked carrot bread, from scratch. I admitted this dirty little secret to a friend who was over at the apartment and she shook her head and stated with certainty that I had become "domestic". Should I take it as a compliment? Initially, and briefly, I was resentful. The very definition has positive and negative connotations.

do•mes•tic –adjective
1. of or pertaining to the home, the household, household affairs, or the family

2. tame; domesticated

and, when used as a noun, it means

3. a hired household servant.

Of course I naturally assume that when people refer to me as "domestic" they mean to say that as a woman I am settling into my role as wife. I struggle with this a little. I love being a wife and I'm proud of the woman I've become. I love taking care of our home, my husband and some day, our family. However, I have a hard time with it because I consider myself to be an independent, progressive thinker who doesn't settle into traditional roles easily ... and can put up quite a fight for equality (especially around the household chores - ahem).

At the end of the day, I guess "being domesticated" isn't necessarily a bad thing, depending of course, on the context of the comment. I think it’s ok to be both the wife and the independent feminist. After all I can have my cake and eat it too, right? I embrace my role as homemaker and I stand behind my role as a free independent thinking woman.

Scratches head
Because I'm certainly not tame (ask Leigh, bless him) and if anyone takes me for a hired household servant they can fu*k off.

By the way, the carrot bread was tasty ... not as sweet as some would have liked it … but the point wasn't to make CAKE it was to make BREAD which is typically not a sweet, but a somewhat-savory-with-a-touch-of-sweet food item.

It's not as hot today, which is nice. California is on fire - old news - seriously though, I don't remember the last time I saw a clear sky. I think all of the smoke in the air is beginning to affect my breathing. At least today there was a breeze.

Work this week was "ich" - for no particular reason - it just was, and I was happy today was Friday. I went out last night with a co-worker and we drank and gossiped, sitting along University Ave. in Palo Alto at this sidewalk cafe/bar called Pasta! It was a lovely evening and very much needed. That piece in this job has been missing. Not the gossiping so much as the camaraderie (I've discovered that I am a group oriented person. I like having people around me. I'm not nearly as solitary a creature as I pretend to be) This sounds crazy but it's taken a year for me to have a drink with someone from work. People at the office are difficult to befriend beyond the hours of 8-5pm. Not because they aren't likable. Most of them are great; and while at work we chat, go for walks during lunch, step inside each other's offices to gripe about a client, we don't do anything else. Many of them can't be bothered and that says a lot.

Last weekend we went up north to Willits. We adopted a kitten named Simon.



He's very small and very cute. Bailey is tolerating him; more so today than she did when we first brought him home, when she could have killed us both for bringing home a tiny ball of fluff. Leigh is such an over-protective, doting father. It's really very cute.

I've been to two concerts in the past two weeks. Both were great fun in different ways.

I ordered an Obama '08 bumper sticker : )

I am starting my Detox program tomorrow :|

I am addicted to Supernanny. I wish I could hire her to raise our children ... when we have them ; )

My husband is the Grill King ... tonight he BBQ'd Kebabs. Mmm, mmm, good.

Hornsby's Apple Cider is pretty tasty and a fine alternative to beer - sometimes.

It was very hot this weekend ... I miss the rain.

My sister comes home next week after being away for 2 months. Lucky traveler.

We saw Iron Man tonight. Good film.

It's 9:40pm and I still have two loads of laundry to dry. I hate that there are only 4 machines in the laundry room.

Next Saturday haircut - Yay!

Today is your Birthday - na na na na na na na - it's my Birthday too! na na na na na na na

Wishing you all the best out there in Colorado! It's good to be a Gemini!

and a very Happy Birthday to you too!! Aww thanks so much :) I hope you have a lovely day today and that all smiles are upon you. Lots of hugs!